I believe in forgiveness. Growing up without my dad was hard. I tend to push everyone away who was only trying to be there for me. When I was younger, I was “Daddy’s little girl.” I was always with my father. One day everything changed. He cheated on my mother and got another girl pregnant. The other girl ended up having a baby boy, and when he got a little bit older we got close. When I was around six years old, my dad finally left my mother without any explanation. My father was in and out of jail, and I remember those days I used to go see him. It was hurting him being away from me, but I disliked him for leaving me behind. A couple of years later he got out, but by this time I was already over him. He got it easy. My mother never put him on child support, so he took advantage of it and blocked me off everything.
However, no matter what my family is going through, holding a grudge does not make me strong; it makes me bitter. Living my life in hate and sadness is not going to help anything. I have to learn to let go. It is not going to be easy, but then again life is not easy. Anybody can die any minute, and I do not want the last words I said to a person that died be something bad. I would end up hurting for the rest of my life. I let my past get the best of me, but no more. Because at the end of the day, he is my father, no matter if I like him or not. God gave me two parents, a mother and a father, and I love them both. In the end family is all I have. When friends disappear, who will still be there? Oh, that’s right -- nobody but family.
On Thursday, January 11, 2018, after school, I got the worst news ever that changed me in so many ways. I found out that my brother Jeremiah had died, and what made it sadder is he passed a month before his birthday. My brother wasn’t a troublemaker; he had a nice job, and he was providing for his kids. His girlfriend was In the hospital having his son when she found out he was dead. My dad called me and said he was sorry for everything. Now, the old me would have hung, up not caring; but I did not. I told my father I loved him, that I forgave him. That same night we fixed everything. Now we are closer than we ever were, but it is sad it took a loss for us to start back talking.
Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future. Everybody deserves a second chance. Nobody is perfect; we all make mistakes. What hurt the most is it took my brother to lose his life to notice that I need my father, and I was being selfish. Living my life with no regrets, I’m stronger than I thought. I believe in forgiveness. This I believe.